November Madness.

Well that´s the fiestas over then, and it was probably the busiest we´ve ever had in the Cumberland Bar. A great week with some new faces showing up this year apart from some of the usual characters - i.e The mayor and mayoress of Benidorm (Colin and Betty), Angie, Val and their gang including Baz and his “I predict a riot” routine whereby the audience hurl beer mats at the stage to the “Kaiser Chiefs” classic hit – somebody selotaped 4 of the buggers together and nearly had Nigel´s eye out. Maggie Newman and her crew, Max and Andy, Chucklin Bob and Claire plus Stelly and his loons from Macclesfield.


Benidorm will go into sleep mode now until Christmas and the Cumberland Bar will shut for a few days at the beginning of December when a few of us will bob over to Blackpool and have a jolly up with a few of our “members” over there.
http://www.kevinholt.net/

And Oscar for best actor goes to..........

Well, we´ve enjoyed a prolonged summer here this time around – been back a month now and it still hasn´t been cool enough to slide beneath the duvet yet, mind yer the rain didn´t half come down today and washed several pensioners into the sea, so that could be that.


We had a great turn out for the first showing of our Blackpool Reunion DVD the other Sunday and would like to thank who attended and those who were called upon to do a speech upon bagging an Oscar. Typically The Chairman droned on for hours boring everybody to tears but I think the old boy was genuinely moved for once. You can now purchase a copy from The Cumberland Bar at 6 euro, 1 euro of which goes to “Help For Heroes”. Next up, the halloween party and then the November Fiestas. Below - Director Karl King.

Haven't been on here a while but it's been a fairly hectic summer so far. First off, largely through tragically inadequate planning I managed to spin out my charity trek down the east coast from Skeggy to Southend from about 300 mile to nearer 400, and finished up a stone and a half lighter and with a little toe like a sorry piece of sausage meat left out for the dog. Would just like to take this opportunity to give a big thanks to all of those who contributed. - Big thanks.
Our 4th annual Blackpool reunion for the "Cumberland Ex-Servicemen's Club" was a huge laugh with packed venues for all 3 nights, Nigel and Yvonne's hard graft to make it all happen has to be applauded and long may they continue. The event was filmed this year by Karl King and if the two trailers are anything to go by the final cut will be a cracker, so thanks mate you did a great job. To view clips click -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sk_nXPooCU0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGBrrJIj3xY

(The football match was a classic encounter).
The rest of the summer has a certain uncertainty about it for me. I was supposed to be writing the life story of one of Blackpool's most loved and popular entertainers, but as it turns out he can't remember any of it, so that's a bit of a snag.

Another Season Just Flashed By.

And so there it is, the end of another season and an emotional finish to this one with the final show from Alan Dodd. Elvis has left the building for the last time. Good luck to him and I hope we meet up again someday.


I´m now in training for my charity trek from Skegness to Southend in aid of “Help For Heroes” in July, it´s been going pretty well but the extreme heat here has brought me out in unsightly red blotches (I hope it´s the heat anyway), and today they´ve gone all itchy. Am not walking today as don´t want to risk having to do my last show in “Sinatras” tonight in Cliff Richard´s tennis shorts with red “mump” like legs and thus scaring the kids. If you want to contribute you can go to my “Just Giving” site – http://www.justgiving.com/kevin-holt and I would like to thank all our members who have so far contributed 170 pounds!

After the walk it´s full steam ahead with our 4th annual Blackpool Reunion in August, for details of this see -
http://www.cumberlandbarbenidorm.com/blackpool2011.html

You will be able to follow my painstaking progress on the walk on Facebook (Kevin holt benidorm) and on this blog.

Ta ra for a bit.

ALAN DODD.

On Sunday 26th June our resident Elvis Alan Dodd will perform his last show for us at The Cumberland Ex-Servicemen´s Club. He´s been with us for 5 years working every Sunday and Wednesday and the man is a legend! I´ve worked with Alan in several pubs and for the whole duration of my 12 years here and it´s been a real pleasure for sure. I can´t remember him ever letting us down, forever on time and always giving it everything he´s got whether there be 3 or 300 in the audience. He´s going to be sadly missed that´s for sure and we all wish him and his dad all the best for the future. It´s also our last show of the season and we are hoping to film the event for posterity.


Cheers Elv.

There´s Leaves On The Trees And Everything - Spring?

When we get to May I always wonder where the season has gone, my stint ends at the end of June whereby I generally crawl inside a cardboard box and hibernate until September.


I´ve been doing a fair bit of filming again with my mate Carl and after 3 days grafting away in the “Cumberland” he´s got to put his not inconsiderable skills into putting it all together so it appears “real”. It´s a bit complicated to explain but if you cast your mind back to the old Mike Yarwood shows whereby he would appear on screen as several different characters at once then you´re on the right track.

Going back a few weeks we had a good day for our St. George´s Day party, which went on a bit longer than it should have. Hat´s off to Nigel and Yvonne for actually having one – think it´s the only bar in town that does! – Photo – me Nigel and “Blue nose Trev”.

"Have Supermarket Carrier bag - Will Travel."

Through the guise of the Concert Chairman I´ve been enjoying getting out and about a bit lately. First we went to the beautiful mountain village of Guadalest whereby he moaned and groaned his way up the many steps yearning for his allotment. Next on the list was the picturesque waterfall “Fonts De Algar” at Callosa, the location for the old “Timote” shampoo advert, this was another cloudless day with some unseasonal hot sunshine. This was not appreciated by our friend however as he spent the whole afternoon complaining that he couldn´t get a bet on for The Grand National.


Hat´s off to my mate Carl, - cameraman, director, producer and all round editing genius. For this venture was his idea and I´m constantly fascinated watching him bring the piece together on his computer with his technical wizardry and eye for comic detail. We´ve got a few more trips planned including a possible trip to Switzerland at the end of the summer, The Concert Chairman stars in “Carry On Up The Eiger?”

SHHHH! - It´s All So Quiet.

Quiet this week due to the “The kid´s are on holiday so let´s whack up the flights” policy that gets on all our collective “Threpenny bits” here. The best character in the Cumberland Ex-Servicemen´s Club this week is Lindon, a gentleman 80 years of age who Irish dances on one leg – at the drop of a hat. – It used to be two legs but he fell off a roof and damaged the other one (I kid you not). As he explained, it wasn´t quite as bad as it sounds, as he fell off one roof on to another (about 12 foot). Still, it goes down so well that we´re all secretly hoping that his bad leg doesn´t get better.


Must just tell you this, was strolling home from the shop the other day when one of these infuriating Indian blokes who seem to own all the electrical shops over here was as usual touting for trade. He shouted over to a young couple in front of me “Come inside and see my offers!” The young lady inquired of her boyfriend, “What did he say?” – “Don´t know” he replied, “it sounded like “Come ere and see my bollocks”. – They didn´t go inside.

"Mad Mozzer Littlemore - The Lunatic Runcorn Dwarf".

We get one or two characters down the old Cumberland Ex-Servicemen´s Club it has to be said, but we´ve just had one of my favourites here for the last couple of weeks. “Mad Mozzer Littlemore, - the lunatic Runcorn dwarf” has been making me chuckle for years. The way he puts on some bizarre wig or head gear, and then gets up all deadpan and sings a completely straight song, his Tommy Cooper style “Runcorn Ferry” monologue complete with a different hat and voice for each character, and whatever that “Fairy routine” is all about? - For this he wears a frilly yellow tutu, a pair of wings strapped to his back and a sparkly wand that he waggles provocatively at his crotch and sings some old Danny Kaye song whilst balancing on one leg. At our Blackpool reunion last year he gave us a rendition of Moon River, or at least I think it was, in truth it was hard to tell what he was singing, mainly due to the fact he was wearing a mask and snorkel and flapping along the stage in a pair of over large flippers.


It´s a rare talent he´s got, because even when he´s dressed normally and being totally sincere he´s still hilarious. He had us all in fits last Sunday when he told of his visit to the market where he bought a belt. He saw a few trendy “Diesel” ones hung up on a rail for show, and when he asked for one, he was handed one already folded up and trussed up with rubber bands, it´s only when he got home and unravelled it that he discovered it had “I Am Gay” written at intervals along its length.

Another major player is “Big Babs from Blackpool” who has a booming personality and has the type of thunderous chortle that can de-froth a pint of bitter from up to four tables away. She too is a huge fan of Mozzer and can be seen embracing him in a terrifying bear-hug and throwing him about like a Rotweiller with a cuddly toy as soon as he enters the building. This week saw them perform together for the first time, - I think Mozzer was supposed to be Sonny Bono, but had more of a look of Fu Manchu to be honest, but whatever, it was very well received. – Long may you rein sir.